13 x SHOOZ SYNOPSES:
EPISODES 1 – 9
(brief outlines of 10 – 13)
EPISODE 1 (PILOT): TINA LEAVES HER COMFORT ZONE
TINA and GINA recently arrived in the cupboard, and are snugly encased in their shoebox on the very top shelf. Tina feels restless after a while and leaps out of the box down to the next shelf where her adventures begin by meeting the running shoes, SID’n’DAN.
Shy Dan is counting his press-ups with his eyes closed and gets such a shock when Sid shouts at him about their visitor that he hurtles off thinking they’re late for their marathon. A frantic chase ensues, with Tina trying in vain to catch up.
She gives up and drags herself over to the gumboots, GROOMBIE and MADUMBI. They eagerly explain their job – overcoming obstacles like deep puddles and more. Paramilitary toughies in their dreams, they forget they’re shiny yellow wellies. Their bragging and hinted challenges sting Tina into proving herself ‘in the wet’. She conquers the fishbowl, briefly invading Fanta’s home. Aghast, Fanta asks how long she’ll be staying.
Gasping for breath and freezing, Tina drips her way along to the school shoes, ‘ARRIS and ‘ARRIET. They immediately try to intimidate/impress her with news of world events. One reads the newspaper upside-down, the other looks at the comics. Specs glinting, they invite her to ‘read’ something too. ‘Arris offers her his specs. Of course Tina sees these as nothing more than face furniture and when she drips water onto the paper, ‘Arriet roars at her. Tina dives off the shelf in fright; she sails down to the floor where she lands soggily in the warm depths of lightly dozing OUMA SCHLIFF, the female half of the ExtraComfy-Cozytoes© bunny slippers.
An outraged squawk from Ouma Schliff at this violation rouses Oupa Schloff from fond dreams of his horse coming in. Ouma Schliff tells Tina off loudly as Oupa Schloff tries to work out what Tina is. ‘Maybe a squid like we saw that time on…’ But Tina has had enough. Feeling misunderstood and rejected, her misery spirals into the fury of a first-class diva.
Jumping up and down and shrieking with outrage, her ribbons whirling and slashing, she loudly denies being a squid, a runner-after-anything, a puddle-jumper or a bookworm… The other shoes have gathered round with reactions ranging from bewildered to affronted remarks. When ‘Arris finally demands to know what she is then, the question is unexpectedly answered behind Tina by Gina who has come to find her.
(This paragraph essentially sums up the pilot show’s main concept:
Fitting in is not the only option)
Confronted with this self-possessed and glossy counterpart of the bedraggled and pitiful Tina, the shoes’ antagonism turns to curiosity, then to enthusiastic admiration when Gina decides to use the warm-up for their show that night as an impromptu performance. The end of the episode features the two ballet shoes whirling about like two gymnastic ribbon dancers while the others applaud and then join in. Tina turns to Gina – ‘I nearly forgot myself, didn’t I?’ Gina replies, “But you haven’t forgotten our dance. Or your steps.’ The main theme music becomes a mash-up – the theme tune of each character starts as they all join in.
Fade-out on the Shooz dancing.
EPISODE 2: THE PARROT INCIDENT
Action happens in bedroom, passage, under and around bed and shoe cupboard.
Soft gumboot theme music introduces the scene. Gumboot Groombie is lying on his side under the bed, abandoned and forgotten there by his owner whom we never see. The Parrot makes his entrance as a swooping shadow flitting over the various items in the bedroom, like that of an eagle. When he lands, he makes a few comical nods and bows, undoing the implied threat of a moment before. He waddles along pausing only to screech at the goldfish, who responds with his standard ‘Hello Doll. Do you come here often?’ When the parrot gets to Groombie, he starts nibbling him experimentally, dashing back and then coming in for another quick nip. Groombie is on his side and unable to right himself, like a tortoise on his back. He yells and shouts for help, desperate in this unaccustomed helplessness, all bravado gone. His eyes blaze with indignation at the indignity. He threatens the parrot with amazing and unusual punishments but the parrot keeps coming back, eventually even kicking him contemptuously.
Sid’n’Dan are setting out for their evening run and see what’s happening. They come to a skidding halt, and run around the two, yelling and lashing at the parrot with their shoelaces but hitting Groombie more often than The Parrot. Lots of grunted ‘OW!!s’ from Groombie. They each curl their laces around The Parrot’s legs, and drag his feet out from under him. The parrot lands on his beak and is furious. He disentangles and rights himself by flying upwards, then lands and starts to sharpen his beak on the metal leg of the bedside table muttering dark threats. Then rushes them, beak agape. The tackies flee, promising Groombie they’ll get help. Groombie lies there trying to be brave and gritting his teeth, then closing his eyes as the parrot comes for him again. <Fade to black>
The school shoes are playing hopscotch when the tackies come running up. They hop skip and jump in unison or separately in the time-honoured hopscotch fashion while they laugh at the tackies urging them to hurry. Having got there, they leap over the prone Groombie and land on either side of the parrot, startling him as they shout on each side, telling him impossible knock-knock jokes and giving him no time to answer. The tackies have also come back with the ballet shoes who twirl in, whirling their ribbons like nunchakus.
With the school shoes shouting at him, the tackies lashing his feet together, and the ballet shoes hypnotising him with whirling ribbons as they steadily wrap his beak up, The Parrot is soon helpless. He falls over, trussed like a turkey ready for the oven, and when the school shoes ask him whether he will go back to his cage his eyes bulge, become bloodshot and he shakes his head. But by now the school shoes have righted Groombie and he is staggering around groaning from his wounds.
Into this scene comes Madumbi, his theme tune loud and commanding, leaning more towards toyi-toyi sounds for the occasion. He threatens to stamp the Parrot’s lights out. The Parrot agrees with silent nods and furious eyes to go back. He is released and flies off, leaving a feather behind.
Madumbi carries his compadre home to the shoe-cupboard. The tackies reassure a tearful Tina that Groombie will be alight. Ouma Schloff will give him some sweet tea when they come back from watching TV. The three pairs of shoes decide to play hop-scotch – but no, boys can’t play, so the tackies can’t join in. Leapfrog? suggests Dan – but no the school shoes have no laces or ribbons. Roller-blading? Not for Tina or Gina, they’re too narrow
Scene fades as they still argue. Theme music for the three pairs comes on and plays us out. Then unexpectedly Tina pops up in the foreground: ‘Morabaraba!’ Cheers all round.
EPISODE 3: A MILITARY TATTOO
Action happens in and around the shoe cupboard.
Groombie and Madumbi are on their shelf and Madumbi is taking a close look at Groombie while he leans over floppily to Madumbi. Madumbi rocks back and forth. ‘Eiiiissssh Buti, that bird really chowed you man. Igcute maninginingi impela. Ayayayayayay!!’
‘Dude’, says Groombie, ‘Suka wena. Go away and leave me alone. And it wasn’t a helluva rooster, it was a parrot. You and your ‘gcute’. Let me just sit here with my horrible memories. I don’t want to think about it pal. And I never want to talk about it again.’
Madumbi stands there silent, drooping slightly.
‘But <beep> man, look now how I look man. I was going to ask Gina out and now look. All I want is a bit of houding back again.’
‘Ag nee man, Buti – Groombie listen to me. Girls like a wounded soldier. Then they can play Mommy. You’ve got history! You have scars Buti. It’s something to talk about at parties Butiwam’. And so the two compadres talk on. The goldfish adds a Yebo and a Ja here and there, but eventually yawns, gets its hot-water bottle out from behind a plastic castle and goes to sleep. Madumbi then assures Groombie that everything will be just the same and Groombie disagrees violently.
‘The last time I saw lace-work like this it was on my Ouma’s broeks and I didn’t like it then either.’
They almost come to blows, and then they reconcile, especially when Groombie remembers it was actually Madumbi who saved him in the end, along with some help from the others. But there are still the holes in Groombie and he’s not happy.
Along come the slippers, with Ouma fluffing up with horror and looking twice her normal size. She hisses when she sees what the parrot did. But then she’s full of advice. Oupa Schloff says nothing, just looks sad. ‘I’m sorry, I wasn’t there, my boy. If I was younger…’
The school shoes come pattering along with their satchels. ‘Hellooo!’ They look everywhere but at Groombie and then come up with an excuse about urgent homework, push up their specs with their straps and off they hurry.
The tackies run past and on their way back, they stop, puffing and arguing about whose time was best. They are full of hearty cheer, slapping Groombie on the back with their shoelaces and high-fiving each other. Exuding false jollity, they shout ‘Howzit, Boykie!? Okay then? Feeling better? Good good good, excellent, Guy…’ and then they run off grinning hugely till they’re out of sight of Groombie, when their smiles drop upside down.
Wafting along come Tina and Gina, full of gentle concern. Tina pats Groombie gently, Gina looks sympathetic. They’ve brought flowers someone threw at them the night before. ‘Only slightly bruised’, says Tina. ‘They will sympathise too, they’ve also taken a beating,’ says Tina. Gina giggles but tries first to stop it then to hide it.
Off they go.
Groombie and Madumbi are left alone. ‘Ja, ‘Butiwam’ says Groombie with heavy sarcasm, what do you say now, hey?’ A few tears leak out of his eyes and his voice creaks unsteadily.
‘Maybe they’ll plant a flower in me and I’ll move to the garden, and then the pigeons can….’
‘Wait!’ says Madumbi and he hurries off.
‘Ja I’ll wait says Groombie. What else must I do? Who wants a gumboot with holes in?’
Back comes Madumbi with all the other shoes. They each have kokis in red and blue.
‘Welcome to Madumbi’s tattoo parlour!’ says Madumbi. Groombie looks amazed. ‘Goeie…’ His eyes pop open as Tina and Gina (elected as the artists) draw flowers, birds, stars, hearts and arrows around the holes in Groombie. Groombi asks them very nicely just not to draw a parrot. Maybe some swallows. And not TOO many flowers. But he’s enjoying it (‘It tickles!’) and a smile slowly spreads across his face. School-shoes are holding kokis, the tackies pass them to Tina and Gina. Slipper are watching TV.
We leave the scene as the artwork is being completed. All the theme tunes combine as we zoom in and fade out on the flowers, birds, stars and three sergeant stripes that now decorate Groombie.
EPISODE 4: THE SULTANA’S SLIPPERS DROP IN
Action happens in and around shoe cupboard, bedroom window, bathroom.
With a lilting Eastern melody, two golden, pointy-curly slippers come gliding through the window on a little prayer mat, and land gracefully in front of the shoe cupboard. After duly introducing themselves and meeting the astounded Shooz, (Fluffy slippers are watching TV) the newcomers in their glittery golden finery are momentarily mistaken by Fanta for his parents. He is inconsolable when he realises his mistake but cheers up when they offer to take him in his bowl for a ride on the carpet, if Groombie and Madumbi would support the bowl on each side. Which they do. Fanta is very happy and soon forgets what he was crying about.
Of course everyone else also clamours for a ride, and the slippers patiently oblige. They have come to meet new friends and find out about other people’s customs. The female half, Yasmeen, is a travel writer. He is a photographer. (This could be an opportunity to tell the viewers more about the Shooz’ various backgrounds and quirks, nothing unmissable, just entertaining for first-time viewers as well as regular fans who are watching.)
The slippers also convey a few interesting things about Muslim culture and their own lives, how they met etc. Their country is in a state of war, and they were lucky to get out, have travelled the world but now they are homesick and would love to go back. In the end, there’s no place like home.
The golden slippers convince the Shooz that they can also perform this amazing feat of flying through the air – ‘It’s your mind that makes the magic happen, not the carpet!’
The Shooz have dragged the fluffy pink bath mat into the room and stand in an expectant circle around it. Tina gives a little hop of excitement and Schliff snaps at her to concentrate. Soon the shoes are all willing the fluffy bathmat to launch into the air. Achmat and Yasmeen (The gold slippers) climb on and it zips around the bathroom. The other shoes try it too, but it will only rise a few inches and that only when Tina and Gina are on it. The golden slippers say the schools shoes can go for a ride and they’ll do the magic from the ground. All goes well till the school shoes lose their nerve and scream, breaking the visitors’ concentration and causing the mat and the shoes to fall into the toilet. Tina and Gina rescue them and are just hauling them out when in come the green bunny slippers. Schloof gapes open-mouthed at the visitors. He mutters about Tobruk… he remembers a young lady, with tassels… Ouma Schliff goes a brighter shade of green. She pooh-poohs this magic rubbish and says it’s high time everyone was in bed. The rather soggy bathmat which was once more hovering above the bath and dripping steadily, lands with a loud soggy noise.
Yasmeen smiles. It’s time they went, she says.
Fade-out with the Shooz all on the windowsill, swaying goodbye to the disappearing slippers on their prayer mat silhouetted against a full moon and disappear into the dark blue starry sky. The normal theme music takes on a distinctly Eastern flavour to end this episode.
EPISODE 5: BUT IS IT ART?
Action happens in and around shoe cupboard.
The shoes are congratulating Groombie who is admiring himself in a hand mirror held by Tina and Gina. The others discuss also having decorations done. The school shoes point out the shoe polishing kit, extolling its marvels and how shiny they look every morning, thanks to the magic of shoe-polish.
Groombie confides in Madumbi that he’s happy to attract attention for the right reasons but wonders if it isn’t all a bit much. Madumbi teases him, saying he should regard it as make-up. In any battle, according to his friend Eddie, the elephant of surprise is very important. But if you haven’t got an elephant, like, say Hannibal the Great, then what could be more surprising than a whole bunch of soldiers or security guards wearing make-up? Groombie chases him off the shelf. Madumbi grabs two stray socks in passing and uses them as parachutes on the way down.
Ouma Schliff disapproves of tattoos and graffiti. Oupa Schloff would like to show everyone his WWII tattoo but Ouma Schliff prevents him, saying it’s not the right time or the place… Oupa says he really does remember when he had it done and even where it is. The tackies try to convince Ouma Schloff that Groombies tat was necessary. It’s called cosmetic enhancement, and then she’s fine with it, starts to discuss Extreme Makeovers, products on the shopping channel and so on. She wonders if she wouldn’t look a bit slimmer if she got a haircut. And maybe a pink streak would look nice. Oupa Schloss’s eyes go wide. He shuts them tightly and shudders slightly.
Along come the running shoes. All the gumboots on the street are wearing patterns like Bridegroom’s now. Groombie laughs. Madumbi sulks. Tina is as usual caught up in the general excitement and wants to participate. She settles on the school shoes’ method of personal enhancement and proceeds to cover herself with black polish. With their theme music blaring, she makes a twirling, leaping entrance along the top shelf to show Gina who’s reading an Italian magazine, but when she catches sight of Gina’s expression, the theme music slows and quieten. With a final discordant whimper it stops.
Gina is horrified. They don’t match. She asks Tina why she used something that is clearly not meant for ballet shoes. Tina replies that she read the tin on top and bottom and around the sides and nowhere did it say ‘not suitable for ballet shoes’. Gina has a re-think, aloud. They don’t match… but Tina is her sister. She has to follow suit because Tina cannot undo what she has done. So Gina also applies the polish, thoroughly convinced. They each touch up the areas the other can’t reach. ‘We can be black swans!’ she proclaims. I think The Boss might like us like this!’
The other shoes are all talking amongst themselves, discussing Groombie and Oupa Schloff’s tattoos. It is swiftly agreed that some tattoos are best hidden away, pulling at Schloff’s green fluff to better conceal the offending design. They all fall silent when the ballet shoes make a whirling entrance. Ouma Schliff says ‘Oh my….’ Then threatens to spank them both. Oupa Schloff just opens and closes his mouth, quite speechless. Then he tearfully announces that he’s off to watch TV. Ouma Schliff follows, muttering that if it weren’t for the fact that spankings are out of fashion… ‘Yes,’ Oupa says – ‘The Child Abuse Unit will come and spank YOU, Ouma.’
The tackies are trying to make the best of it and assume the ballet shoes want to go to a Goth party.
‘It’s not Halloween, is it?’ – Dan. Sid just scratches above his eyes with a shoelace.
The school shoes appear to approve. They think there could be more of a shine, so they encourage the ballet shoes to keep rubbing and buffing.
‘Spit and polish’ suggests ‘Arris.
‘Arriet laughs spitefully, her glasses pointing upwards at the corners.
‘Disgusting!’ shudders Gina, wrapping her pinkish-blackish ribbons tightly around her. Then – ‘Enough is enough! – let’s get to practice.’ Both are disillusioned about their new appearance, bending anxiously over the hand mirror discarded on the floor, and leaving marks on everything as they go.
They exit, dancing but not with full enthusiasm, their music reflecting this.
The shoe cupboard becomes darker. Schloff and Schliff reappear. They tell the Shooz that Tina and Gina won’t be back for a while. They heard downstairs that the girls have to go off to get recovered. Whatever that is. All speculate on what this could mean, with the school shoes and Schloff talking about retreads.
‘I miss those two airheads’ says ‘Arris to ‘Arriet as they settle down to sleep.
‘It’s been weeks, hey?’ replies ‘Arriet. It’s weird without the shoebox up there….so quiet without Tina. ‘I feel a bit bad – we started it.’
‘Arris says ‘Rubbish – they needed a change, that’s all. We all have to try stuff out. Doesn’t always work, but it could have.’
Sid chimes in from the far side – ‘Exactly – how will you know if you don’t try something new every now and again? If you never make a mistake…’
‘You’ll never make anything!’ joins in Dan in a sing-song as if they’ve learned this at some self-improvement course. Which is very likely.
Then Tina and Gina reappear. Late at night their box is placed back on the top shelf and in the morning, there they are, looking better than ever – brightly smiling and glowing pinkly among all the compliments they receive from the Shooz. They look exactly as they did before.
‘I forgot how beautiful they are’, says Schloff. ‘You don’t value beauty until it’s gone.’ Schliff looks at him narrowly.
‘What do you mean, Skattie?’
‘Ag you’re my beauty Angel, says Schloff. ‘Your beauty is eternal, you never have to worry about that.’ Schliff closes her eyes, smiling. Then opens them again, looking into the middle distance, her eyes sliding to the side as an errant pink ribbon flashes past her ears and the theme music comes in. Schliff smiles, decides to cast aside her dark thoughts and join everyone dancing. Soon she’s in the middle being the star turn.
<Fade out with C/U of Schliff’s smiling face, eyes closed in bliss>
EPISODE 6: UBUNTU AND ALL THAT:
Action happens in and around shoe-cupboard
Haughty, upper-crust riding boots, Lord and Lady Blenkinsoft appear in the cupboard.
The school shoes mock them, shouting ‘Tally-ho’ and blowing horns made of newspapers. Turns out the riding boots have a secret though – They are very shy but do their best to cover it up, so they hid behind newspapers, saying they are looking at the race results and timetable for the next gymkhana.
Schloff is delighted, thinking he has someone with whom he can discuss horse-racing. But the boots (Lord and Lady Blenkinsoft), though relieved to find someone with a similar interest, are not sure about Schloff’s background. So they carefully and politely vet Schloff and the other Shooz, who then ignore them. ‘Lord and Lady B’ then decide to form a bridge club instead and perhaps include the school shoes since only they seem to show the capacity for learning the rules of the game but the school shoes are evasive and say they have too much homework.
Eventually after the boots end up thoroughly excluded due to the hurt feelings they’ve caused, the other shoes relent, and convince the boots that they have far more to lose by being exclusive than by rubbing toecaps with the hoi polloi. This they do by pointing out things they have in common: the ballet shoes love the theatre life and ballet of course; the running shoes love outdoor sports; the wellies are from a similar tribe with a common ancestor; the school shoes are the only other shoes made of leather and the slippers are horsey in their own way, enjoying the races, whether betting or just watching dressage on TV.
The episode draws to a close with the shoes all staging a ‘Unity in Diversity’ rally but not without some fairly rocky obstacles as they prepare their banners (‘Isn’t that a little garish my deah?’), and organise the party in general. (Sweetcorn in gem squash?! How novel!’) However, all’s well that ends well and the Blenkisofts land on the society pages; all feel very proud by association.
<Fade-out on the festive party, the banner in the background, with each pair of shoes entering the centre of the circle and doing a little dance while the others clap in time to the music. Sometimes the banner falls down and the dancers emerge again, each handling it differently.>
EPISODE 7: SLIP-SLIDING AWAY:
Action happens in and around shoe-cupboard, bed-side table and windowsill
A brand new pair of slip-slops or beach thongs is thrown onto the top shelf, lie stunned for a while and then start doing back-flips and circus tricks. Schliff complains and expresses shock at their scanty attire and shocking behaviour, and bans them from her sight, huffing off to watch her soapie. The Shooz gather round, the two gumboots try to engage them in gumboot dancing and say it’s about time things livened up around here… There is much whooping and stamping and a few ‘Arriba! Arriba!’s from the thongs. Gina complains about this noise and says there’s no culture or refinement to the slip-slops’ dancing. The tackies have fashioned a barrier from their respective shoelaces knotted in the middle and stretched between them. The riding boots agree but while Lady B tries to draw her husband away, he stays ‘to watch in horror.’
Individually, when no-one’s looking, the shoes gradually come round and warily engage with the beach-thongs who when they’re not tangoing are lying under the bedside lamp or on the windowsill, reading.
‘They just lie there after a whole day at the beach.’ is the general opinion. Resentment builds and builds at the thongs who apparently do nothing but just flop down having returned from a wonderful day at the beach. They look dirty, tired and hot. The conflict builds up to a crescendo when the Brazilians turn on the Shooz and explain that fun is an attitude. It’s no fun protecting the feet from hot sand all day. Even when they go into the change-rooms their day is still not done – then they have to protect the Boss’s feet from athlete’s foot in the shower – it’s hard work!’
The Shooz are fascinated and curious – athlete’s foot? They want to know more.
But the thongs counter with: You don’ wanna know Sweetie!’ Having sick toes is no fun and they’ll explain that sometime…
Ouma Schliff comes up with a sage remark that it’s hard work having fun but you can do it if you really want to or if you absolutely have to. The beach thongs say they really want to have fun, it’s kinda their job, but as long as the other shoes don’t keep on as if they never work…
The Shooz all protest at once that they also like to have fun like the slip-slops. The beach thongs say maybe they’ll teach them sometime… But why not begin with a salsa evening?
The episode plays out with all the Shooz wiggling, some giggling and trying to salsa. Jamaican steel band effect on the theme music.
<Fade-out on Tina wiggling with Juan and Maria, the others passing in the background doing a conga>
EPISODE 8: FLIP AN OUMA:
(Action happens in bedroom, stairs, entrance area, front door, front verandah and steps, garden and fishpond, also chimney of house next door)
The bunny slippers bemoan the fact that they never get to go our and have adventures like Groombie and Madumbi and the others. The school shoes come up with an idea. The slippers will go into the garden, riding in the top of the gumboots. Great, say the gumboots after a quick council of war, but they want to watch TV that evening too. The deal is struck and off go the boots each with a slipper firmly wedged in his top.
All goes well till the Parrot spies them at the bottom of the stairs. Just when Ouma Schliff decides it’s far too dangerous and the stairs give her vertigo from her new vantage point, so she’d rather get out and get back in her taxi at the bottom of the stairs, The Parrot swoops in and removes her from her perch. She screams loudly as he makes for the front door and then goes out of a window with her, knocking her with a soft ploff against the burglar bars in passing.
Ouma Schliff shrieks as The Parrot puts on his own little airshow and enjoys her sound effects with each set of terrifying loop-de-loops, his maniacal cackle increasing with each shriek. (Cue airshow sound-effects and commentator) After a few turns around the fishpond, she becomes distracted by the goldfish swimming below. ‘More Fantas? What…’
Her shock fading, she starts to enjoy it all and nags and even navigates. She orders him to taker her up to the chimney to see a bird’s nest, then instructs him not to fly so fast, then not to bank so steeply. After she demands to be taken to the school so she can see what the school shoes are doing, the parrot becomes irritated and drops her into the fishpond.
The running shoes are fortunately returning from a run and zoot over to rescue her, rowing out to her slowly sinking little fluffy-boat shape with their shoelaces. Or at least Sid is rowing. Dan comes up with the idea of making a propeller out of his shoelaces, frothing along very nicely and gets there first. He can’t resist turning round and grinning at Sid. Then they both get down to retrieving the sodden Schliff and steering her to safety where the intrepid Groombie stands ready, half-submerged in the muddy water. They manoevre her into his holey top and immediately he spouts water from the many holes the parrot made previously. Schloff is watching from the top of the front steps, weeping with happiness at his wife’s safe return.
A big fuss and gentle commiserations immediately happen around Schliff who sneezes uncontrollably on top of a hot-water bottle where Tina and Gina are rubbing her down and fluffing her up with a hair-dryer. Then there is music and dancing in the background and general admiration for Groombie’s courage and Sid’n’Dan’s exploits.
<Fade-out on Schloff presenting a slightly battered silver trophy cup to Sid’n’Dan and a military badge to Groombie.>
EPISODE 9. THE RUNNERS COME CLEAN:
Sid’n’Dan smell terrible. Schliff says they must have stepped in something nasty. Dan says stepped in what? Sid takes him aside. Dan denies anything of the sort. Schoff and Schliff wonder if they have athlete’s foot or some other infection. Sid’n’Dan then remark that rescuing Ouma Schliff from the pond could have caused the smell. The problem was worse after that.
Tina comes out with the fact that Sid’n’Dan have athlete’s foot powder in a corner right at the back of their shelf in the corner. Sid’n’Dan are forced to admit that they do carry the athletes’ foot fungus but appeal to the others for understanding. Uproar. The gumboots want to expel them them from the cupboard ‘for health and safety reasons’, the school shoes feel itchy…
In come the bunny-slippers who heard the commotion over the noise from the TV. They were about to order the epidermally enhanced vitamin enriched electric blanket featured on the shopping channel and are irritated at being interrupted by the noise upstairs. Hearing of the cause of the racket, Ouma Schliff lectures them about the value of athlete’s foot powder. But prevention is better than cure adds Schloff. So it’s best to wear socks all the time especially when someone else borrows your shoes says Schliff, briefly glancing at Schloff sharply for interrupting. (‘Yes Schloff, I was getting to that!!’)
She goes on to lecture them at length about socks preventing the transmission of disease from one shoe to another. Once all the shoes have thoroughly absorbed this, by means of a quiz thrown in – ‘Socks will…. Sid!! What will socks do?’
‘Prevent the…’
‘Prevent the what?’
‘The transition…’
‘Prevent the transition of …no, man the transmission! Ag let me begin again. You kids make me finished.’
‘Sorry Ouma.’
‘No wonder you’re in trouble! Let me begin again. And stop interrupting. Socks will prevent the transmission of foot diseases from one shoe… what will socks prevent the transmission of, Groombie?’
Groombie looks uncertain. He says out the side of his mouth to Madumbi who is staring straight ahead as if he’s on parade ‘Do shoes even have transmissions Bru?’
‘SOCKS!!’ shouts Ouma Schloff, marching up and down in front of the assembled shoes- ‘Socks will prevent the disease of foot transmission from one shoe to another. Gina! What will shoes prevent… uh where was I?’
Oupa Schloff has had enough. He is drifting off to sleep. He opens an eye. ‘KIDS! Wear socks!’
Can we go downstairs now Skattie?’
All the shoes applaud enthusiastically and assure Schliff that they got the message. Schloff pushes Schliff out of the door like a little tug. She complains that she’s always been a dedicated teacher but there’s no such thing as retirement, as long as there is such ignorance in the world.
<Fade-out on the two bunny-slippers reaching the stairs, with Schliff turning every now and again to add an extra complaint we don’t hear>
In 4 possible future episodes of Season One:
(10) the running shoes ‘manage their condition’ and eventually clear it;
(11) beach thongs confess they hid themselves when the owner’s friend wanted to borrow them, since socks aren’t worn with beach thongs;
(12) two ordinary everyday shoes appear, and the others are mystified since these have no specific function, apart from looking kinda pretty;
(13) soccer shoes join them as well, causing pandemonium because The Boss, their girl owner, is playing a boys’ game. The school shoes take the side of the soccer shoes and tell everyone to grow up, because girls can do anything. All sneak downstairs to watch a national women’s team play.
Season Two:
The cast and the story changes and evolves as the shoes are outgrown and replaced. But the ballet shoes are framed and now hang on the wall as observers with frequent remarks.